Wednesday, September 23, 2009

98.6

I went approximately thirty years before I began suffering from seasonal allergies, at least enough to realize what was happening. Then I went quite a few more years dealing with mild allergies that sometimes made my nose itch or occasionally caused my eyes to water, but still had little outward effect. Nonetheless, being me, I should not be surprised that the first time sneezing added itself to my list of allergy symptoms, the world would be in a tizzy about the flu.

If you do not think people are concerned about the flu, sneeze a couple of times in a public place.

Shouting into my elbow that I don't have the flu does not seem to be an effective deterrent against the backing away and concerned looks. And I'm pretty sure at least one parent in the pediatric waiting room opted to go ahead and receive a flu shot themselves only after I violently expelled the spores of fall via the newest of lethal weapons: a nose.

I understand. An ounce of prevention and all that. Save from inventing a tee shirt that electronically displays my current temperature and swearing hand-upon-Bible that I've washed my hands/don't plan to touch anyone anyway/haven't ridden those coin operated germy rides outside stores since I was seven, there is really no way to make the people standing within a ten foot radius feel better about my achoo.

At least my Achoo has toned down. Growing up, it was impossible for me to sneeze without screaming. I simply could not do it. When I sneezed, everyone in the house was aware. Neighbors could hear me if the windows were open (and occasionally, when they were closed). This lasted pretty late into childhood. I suppose I should just feel fortunate I am not dealing with reactions to that.

Hopefully, the air will clear soon and I can return to my already pushing it habit of frequenting dusty thrift stores without fear of clearing the lamp section on one fell choo.

Until then, if you see me and my protesting nose out and about, be assured: I don't have the flu. I don't have a fever. I'm not contagious. All the things that are wrong with me are generally mental.

We can even hug! As long as you're not carrying flowers.

2 comments:

Beth said...

Your blog looks wonderful. It was nice going through your blog. Keep it up the good work. cheers :) beth Iflorist.co.uk

Nicole said...

It is going to be a long winter at this rate. I have a lingering cough from a long gone cold and keep getting asked if I have the swine flu.